The pain and gain of being vulnerable
Being vulnerable is good. It brings depth and meaning to our conversations and invites healthier relationships. After a few books and podcasts I started to embrace vulnerability, but then something happened . . .
I discovered that vulnerability has many levels, and some don’t feel so good.
This discovery came as a result of me trying (again) to be more “present” in life. My first run with “presence” was years ago after reading Eckhart Tolle’s, The Power of Now. Spiritual concepts were new to me and getting out of my head was just too hard. The book was eventually shelved and I went back to spending most of my time in the past and future.
But some of it stuck, and my desire to stay in the moment continues. It’s why I’ve committed to a year-long certification program on the Enneagram where presence is the foundation on which everything is based and built.
First day of class I was introduced to a new tool on how to be more present. I committed to giving it a try even though it sounded a bit strange. It’s hard to explain but the idea is this:
You become a witness to yourself and how you move through your life.
I thought it would be hard to do, but it wasn’t. What was hard was that in taking on the role of witness, I could see all my parts very clearly, including the ugly ones. I was busy at first rationalizing and debating with myself.
I wanted so badly to deny my ugly thoughts and motivations. To argue that what I’m seeing can’t be part of me!
But the ugly is real. Just as real as all my loving, gracious parts that allow me as a coach to see the best in others so that they can see it in themselves. To be a partner and friend even in the tough times.
Being vulnerable with ourselves requires courage and an uncompromising desire to evolve into who we can be. It demands we be honest with ourselves and hold a space for the parts that make us uncomfortable. Only by holding a space can we invite in self-love and compassion so that these parts can be transformed. And over time, they will be.
You know the power of love and its ability to transform. If you want to explore how to invite this power into your life, reach out for a conversation - https://cherylstevens.com/schedule
